Where Are My Loved Ones Now?

by Maureen Hunter on February 16, 2012

Something I get asked often by those who are bereaved, like you, like me is “Where are my loved ones now?” “Are they safe?” “Are they happy?” “Will I see them again?”

I believe they are and you will, but what I believe doesn’t matter, it’s what you believe. It’s your belief alone that ultimately is going to answer those questions for you. 

You might be scrambling about in the dark right now wondering what you do think about life after death. You will no doubt fall into one of these categories:

Yes with absolute certainty.

No, there is nothing after death.

I’m confused; I don’t really know what I believe.

Words linked to the afterlife you may hear and know are heaven, hell, a peaceful place, a sanctuary, the hereafter, kingdom, nirvana, paradise, eternity and Elysian Fields. There are others soul progression, lessons in life, reincarnation. Many of those words are linked to a spiritual foundation or a faith.

It is often the loss of a loved one and the very questions that we ask above which become the triggers for exploration and lead us on a quest to find out more. I did just that and continue to explore my belief systems and my spirituality in general.  I would encourage you to do the same and go looking for the answers you seek.

I’ve read hundreds of books: Christian and spiritual texts, books written by mediums, psychiatrists undertaking past live regressions, near death experiences, angelic encounters, after death communications and much more. It’s stretched me beyond what I knew or believed and strengthened my spiritual foundation, my belief that yes; my son is safe, is happy and is beyond the suffering that we are experiencing here on earth.

I may not know with certainty, none of us really do, but I choose to believe that. It gives me a great deal of comfort. It gives me hope. It gives me peace in my heart but more it sustains me through my darkest days. There are always dark days. Although my life is full and happy now the loss of my precious son’s physical presence always sits within me, alongside my life and always will. There are tears and there are sad days. My belief doesn’t make those go away, it helps me to deal with it.

One of the books I did read very early on was Heaven Is So Real by Choo Thomas which describes her Christian faith and visit to heaven. You know now I can’t even recall where I borrowed it from but there is one thing from that book that will never leave me. She described the flowers in heaven, the colours as being bigger and brighter than here on earth. Just prior to my reading that book I received a “message” from my son. Guess what he spoke of….flowers. He said I would like it where he was, there were so many flowers, and they were bright, so very bright and colourful. That is why I remember that book and that passage. It was an affirmation yet again that yes, he was safe.

So there is much to ponder. If you are already of a strong belief and faith, that alone may already guide and support you greatly through your pain. If you are not, go exploring, go seeking, and go find what you are looking for.
 
I'd love to hear from you. Please leave a comment below…
 
Maureen Hunter is a grief coach, bereaved mother, author and speaker. She is widely known for providing inspiration and instilling hope into the lives of many experiencing grief and loss. Her unique gifts lie in understanding the territory of grief and insightfully helping individuals how to deal with grief and move forwards into their own “living after loss”.


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The Heartbreak of Valentine’s Day

by Maureen Hunter on February 14, 2012

On this day, the 14th February a celebration of great love erupts across the nation. It’s Valentine’s Day. The day that many have come to signify as being all about love and the declaration of that love between two special people. It’s quite a picture, a picture of perfection and togetherness.
 
That picture cracks if your love and togetherness has been shattered by the death of your loved one. There is an immediate separation of your physical selves. There is a rift, a void between two hearts that seems impossible to fill. A day that perhaps in the past was full of happy and treasured moments now becomes a day full of pain. There remains only a gripping longing for what once was.
 
You have been robbed on this day of a great many things, but there remains with you something that death can never steal, can never rob you of, can never rip from you, and is yours forever to cherish and to hold. It is your love. That great love within your heart will never die; your love has become eternal.  It is your forever love, your lasting love.
 
When I think of eternal and enduring love, I am always drawn to Corinthians. Probably one of the most utilised verses at love ceremonies across the globe.  Those words speak of the power of love, the enduring presence of love and the gift that love brings to each one of us. Even though your loved one’s physical presence has gone, their invisible presence is with you always, around you and within you. That is the power of your own true love. That love which stays. That love which can never be lost.
 
Without love, I am nothing – you have love always in your heart, you are everything.
 
Love waits, love stays – your love will wait, your love is with you always.
 
There is great trust in love – trust in the power of love to get your through your darkest days, it sits within you as your beacon, guiding and supporting you.
 
Love is full of hope – love never gives up, love holds hope high.
 
Love persists – it is your constant.
 
Love never fails – the love in your heart will never fail you. Your love endures beyond this world and into the next.
 
On this day when your heart may break and tears may fall, remember love…their eternal love within you.
 
“I can never leave you. I have imprinted myself on your soul forever and planted seeds of perennial love in the garden of your heart.”…..Maureen Hunter
 
I'd love to hear from you. Please leave a comment below.
 
Maureen Hunter is a grief coach, bereaved mother, author and speaker. She is widely known for providing inspiration and instilling hope into the lives of many experiencing grief and loss. Her unique gifts lie in understanding the territory of grief and insightfully helping individuals how to deal with grief and move forwards into their own “living after loss”.



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Are You Weary to the Bone with Grief?

February 9, 2012
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If you are, you’re not alone.  The stress of grief is debilitating and it’s experienced by many after the loss of a loved one.  Grief has the capacity to bring us to our knees physically as well as emotionally. We can feel totally exhausted, knackered, wiped out and depleted. How about spent, fatigued, and crippled [...]

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I Will Come To You In Your Sleep

February 6, 2012
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I wrote this, a poem for grief, last week. Some of you may have seen it on Facebook. It is for anyone who is grieving and feeling so alone in the pain of their loss. It speaks of comfort in the midst of grief. It speaks of a bond that death can never break and [...]

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Dealing with Grief: How to Use Nature’s Healing Power to Transform Loss

February 2, 2012
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My guest writer today is Tabitha Jayne. Tabitha is a leading expert in the field of grief & growth coaching and the author of Thriving Loss: Move beyond grief to a place of peace, passion and purpose. She is also the creator of the Tree of Transformation©, a five step process that helps individuals fully let [...]

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Top 10 Inspirational Grief Quotes

January 30, 2012
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When our hearts are heavy with grief, writing can often be the outlet where not only emotions purge but untapped wisdom lies. I write every single day – articles, blog posts, inspirational posts for my Facebook wall. Sometimes when I look back on what I’ve written I think, wow! Did I really write that? Where [...]

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The 7 Obstacles to Healing from Grief

January 26, 2012
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Life wasn’t meant to be easy and it sure isn’t at times. Smooth sailing, piece of cake…I don’t think so. Ask anyone who is grieving how life is and they’ll soon tell you! Painful situations occur at many junctures throughout our life, some easier than others. Grieving has to be up there as one of [...]

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Please Don’t Go!

January 19, 2012
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A lot of people have been talking about giving up lately. It’s heartbreaking that losing a loved one can bring you to your knees and cripple the love, the joy and the hope from your life. Please don’t give up! Many of you may think they are shallow words and what would I know about [...]

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