I liken those who deal with grief as warriors. Warriors because each person who is grieving the loss of a loved one is actively engaged in a major war. It is a war of engagement, a war of conflict and a war of survival. A war fought on many battlefields of the heart and soul, enduring for many a long day and night.
Nonetheless, you probably don’t feel like a warrior, but you are. Losing a loved one is not something that you chose, but you can choose to be a warrior with a warrior spirit. You can trust in yourself and in your own ability to get through this. This isn’t about denying your feelings or pretending to be someone you are not. It is about instilling the belief in yourself that you can do this.
To accompany you on the battlefield, take with you these words. So named, warrior words to guide and support you towards healing. Some may seem impossible for you to contemplate right now, but don’t forget them. They are here when you are ready, to inspire you and fill you with what you need next.
Hope
Hope hangs on an internal hook, a guiding beacon within, filling you with love and light. Telling you that no matter what, you can and will heal. You will be happy and fulfilled again.
Courage
Life has become uncertain, but even amidst that uncertainty you have decided to take that first step. Moreover, in that first step comes the momentum to keep moving forward amidst the fear and doubt to explore what lies unseen beyond your current reality.
Faith
Even though you don’t think you can get through this – think again. I know you will, hard as it is, I know you can! Faith is the strength that comes from others, from the divine, from the unknowing of life that brings this gift to you.
Authentic
When everything falls apart the greatest strength you have is to be yourself. It is your grief, your journey; your decisions will make it right for you. Your true self will shine through.
Trust
Whilst similar in many ways to faith, trust comes from deep within. It is a well of self-belief that has to grow, becoming stronger each day. You are stronger than you know, stronger than you feel and stronger than you think.
Love
Love always transcends loss, becoming greater with each new dawn. It is the love you have in your heart that will help you find the way.
Resilience
“It is not in the falling that we demonstrate resilience, but in the getting back up again”…I Poulsen. That which gets you up to do what you do every day, amidst the pain, amidst the tears. Facing pain and becoming greater than the pain of grief itself, that is resilience.
Rise
Don’t allow what has happened to you to define your life now in ways that you don’t want. Rise above your circumstances, allow your sorrow to find its voice and roar.
Maureen Hunter is a grief coach, bereaved mother, author and speaker. She is widely known for providing inspiration and instilling hope into the lives of many experiencing grief and loss. Her unique gifts lie in understanding the territory of grief and insightfully helping individuals how to deal with grief and move forwards into their own “living after loss”.
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
Maureen, I just love”Developing a Warrior Spirit”! I have been working with teen groups (TAG) for over 25 years now and I am always looking for new information to share with them. I am going to read this article to them at our next meeting. The things I have learned from these teens has been amazing and I am so happy to have chosen to volunteer to do this all of these years. Your web site is warm and informative and I look forward to all of your postings. Thanks for all you do to comfort the hurting folks in this world.
Jane Smolens, Los Angeles
my daughter lives in Sydney and I visit there twice yearly and just love Australia!
Thanks for your feedback Jane, by all means share it with your teens for their warrior spirit to roar.
I live on the west coast of Australia but we have been over in Sydney and now Queensland on holiday. How wonderful you get to come over twice a year. I’d love to visit America, perhaps one day ~ Maureen
Maureen Hunter recently posted..Developing a Warrior Spirit
Thank You Maureen, These wonderful words of encouragement are so much appreciated.
They are very powerful words Sharon, I always feel better and uplifted just reading and saying them ~ Maureen
Maureen Hunter recently posted..Developing a Warrior Spirit
Maureen, only after losing my mum and dad three months apart,did I only comprehend humility and why we have to suffer to grow as individuals.
Cheers
Libby
Libby recently posted..Disaster Preparedness
Libby losing your parents so close together must have been so very difficult for you.
I too have found the pain of my loss has changed me totally and I have grown in so many different ways, my life is now unrecognisable to what it was. I am grateful to my son and honour him every day for the gifts his death has bestowed on me ~ Maureen
Maureen Hunter recently posted..Developing a Warrior Spirit
Maureen, I love this. This really confirms a lot of my beliefs and how I have survived so far. This month on the 21st will mark nine months since my son Michael died. Still just can’t really believe it on many levels. So glad I found your website. Sending you hugs and prayers
Hugs to you Sharon, and my love crosses miles on the loss of your precious son Michael. A mother’s heart I think in many ways can never believe this has truly happened to one of her own. I am glad you are here, look forward to getting to know you and sharing with you more ~ Maureen
Maureen Hunter recently posted..Developing a Warrior Spirit
Thank you Maureen, is this a new website? There are so many words of comfort you have shared and will always be checking out this site. Thank you for your hard work in helping others see things from a different perspective.
Hi Linda – no it’s not new, its been here for about a year. I established it prior to my facebook page, Stepping through Grief. This is the hub of Esdeer. Look forward to seeing you back another time and thank you ~ Maureen
I have read alot of what you say. What people post. I clicked on this because it caught my attention. Warrior Spirit. I see you mentioned the divine. For me, this would be God. He gives me the strength when to walk each day. I have hope. Hope because He says that one day I will be with my son again in Heaven. This does not mean I do not grieve for him to be with me now. As a mother of course this is what I long for. Each day. And, knowing and seeing his two precious children grieve him is sometimes more than I think my heart can take. I don't believe God took him because He needed another angel. I have faith. Faith in God. I pray for all who grieve. I do not push my relationship with God on anyone. If asked, I will tell them. We are on a journey not by choice. Very personal. We are all trying to make it . One day at a time. I will take on the Warrior Spirit that I believe comes from God. He gives me the power to rise up ..
I have lost both my parents. Although I miss them very much, time has passed and I am no longer in the grieving process. I found your page when searching for encouragement for my 16 year old daughter's boyfriend who had lost his mother recently to suicide. I sent him the link, but occasionally send him specific articles as well. I have also sent several of your articles to a dear friend going through a divorce and she is hurting and I believe that the symptoms of divorce somehow mimic the same stages as losing a loved one. However, this reason I am writing to you is because I wanted you to know that even though I am not presently in the grieving process, I find your articles to be of extreme encouragement to me in everyday life. I think that somewhere along the way I lost the spark to life and was just waking up everyday to the same ole dull routine. I wanted you to know that I believe God has given you a gift like no other because being able to encourage grieving people is not an easy thing to do and you somehow put things in just the perfect perspective and said in just the perfect way! God Bless you in your love and in your marvelous gift. Thank you!!!
Thank you Sherry for your beautiful words ~ Maureen
Thank you Maureen for these words in Developing a Warrior Spirit. Easter Sunday was horrible without Marty. I felt like I was going to colapse seeing everyone having fun and going on with their lives as if nothing had happened. I miss Marty so much and holidays are the worst and I am so glad when they are over. I am always so anxious to read your writings – it helps so much. Marty loved every holiday.
Becky Loflin
Marty's mama