Life is full of endings and by its very nature new beginnings. The old adage when one door closes another opens is so apt and something I have found to be true in so many areas of my own life.
For the past two years I have given my heart and soul to grief. But not to that alone. I have reached out and given hope, encouragement and understanding to many thousands both at Esdeer and on my Facebook page Stepping through Grief. I have laughed with you and cried with you and shared your journeys back to a vastly new and different life after loss. I have felt blessed by the connections with you and humbled by your courage and your great love.
Six years ago as I grappled with my own very deep pain following the death of my son the idea for Esdeer came into being. My conviction then was to “make a difference” to those who were grieving, to use my own experiences of grief to help others. I believe now as I write this that I have done just that. From the emails and notes I receive from you I have made a powerful difference and even have saved lives – what an honor it has been. It has also been a deep commitment of time, resources and self.
I now am finding this self of mine is wanting to take me in other directions. With my writing I have touched into a deep creative part of myself and it’s something I’d like to explore, perhaps in different ways, along with other personal endeavours in the coming months.
And so it is that at the end of October I will be winding up Stepping through Grief on Facebook and my Twitter feed @Esdeer. I know this will be deeply disappointing for many as you have come to see it as a wonderfully safe and understanding place to be. I will be sharing some resources with you in the coming weeks that will provide you with stepping stones to other supportive places.
As for this website Esdeer I really am unsure of what direction it will take. But for now, it will remain as is. What have I always shared with you? Moment by moment, one step at a time and so it is with these big changes I am making right now. And they have been BIG. I have pondered over them for many many nights, and they have been incredibly difficult to make.
So thank you for reading and thank you for being a part of and making Esdeer and Stepping through Grief the wonderful place it has been.
All my love to you.
{ 94 comments… read them below or add one }
I am very new to this page but it has been both a blessing and a comfort to me. I thank you for all your emails and correspondence to me and i wish you luck at what you are doing in the future. I will miss you
I am going to miss you so much, but I understand how and why you must make decisions that are best for you. You have touched my life and heart and I will always remember you. God bless you always and thank you for helping others in a tremendous way! xxoo. Blessings and love ….
Thank you so much for all your understanding and encouragement to keep going forward.I appreciate all the time you have invested to help us through these difficult times.I wish you all the luck in the world on your new endeavor.God speed to you!
Eek…so does this mean your FB page will be deleted?
Oh no…I do not even like the thought of that. There is so much good information and help on that page…even if nothing else is ever added to it!!!
You have been a “light” at the end of my tunnel.. I wish you nothing but the best in your future and want to say thank you for helping me thru some of the darkest days of my life…. HUGS
This is wonderful news ! I am very happy for your growth and it gives me tremendous hope for my life path.
I wish you luck in you next step in life. I also thank you for all the help you have given me in the last 11 months since i lost my son. You have helped me breathe again and for that I am greatful. Thank you very much for you help!!!
Thank you for walking me through the darkest 8 months of my life, Maureen. I wish you the peace, love and happiness of a thousand lives. Best of luck in your new adventures! Hopefully soon, I will be ready to start my own new chapters, and when I do, a big part will be because you helped me get there. God bless you. <3
I only just found you a few months ago!! Even though everyone’s journey is different, I related to every single posting you made. You have been a light at the end of my tunnel. Thank you Maureen, for devoting so much time and effort and for opening your heart to helping me. Praying for God’s blessings on you and yours.
Many, many blessings to you, Maureen. You have comforted me with your words and your passion during the most difficult time of my life. October 27th is the first anniversary of my precious daughter’s death. I have read and re-read your posts during my darkest hours. I have also saved everything to be read again.
I pray for your new adventures. May you find happiness and peace in them. Bless you! We will all miss your wise words and your loving heart. Thank you =)
What a loss for all of us. I respect your decision and wish you nothing but the best. You have been of great comfort and inspiration to me during a very difficult time. May God Bless You and keep you safe. Hugs and love to you for all that you have done for many.
Dear Maureen, I wondered when this day would come and I am so happy for you as I too feel ready to move on into a different phase in my life, somewhere beyond grief. By you now wanting to move on, you have given me the confidence to move on as well as these stirrings inside us become more apparent. Thank-you for your Facebook ‘Stepping through Grief’ and for all that you have done for me personally and the 100s of others who visit this page and for your emails. You have touched my life like no one else through my grief and I am so deeply grateful. Take care and I hope that whatever you do next will be as satisfying and rewarding as “Stepping through Grief’. If it is to be writing, then please know you already can touch people’s lives with your words – a wonderful gift. Thank-you once again Maureen, I will hold you in my thoughts and with much gratitude.
I have truly enjoyed the thoughts you have given through booth of your sites. I will miss the thoughtful & encouraging words of wisdom.
I wish you the very best in your new endeavors.
My very best to you.
Marilynn
I lost my sister in a motorcycle accident on August 11, 2012. Stepping through Grief has helped me deal with it, even though I am still having a very rough time. God bless you for all that you have done. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and may your next adventure be all that you want it to be.
Dearest Maureen,
I am fairly new to your writings & have truly appreciated all of them. I have so many friends who are also on their grief journeys that I have shared you with many & they have also been touched.
As you have said before, each of our journeys are different, but the same.You need to do what’s best for you!!!
May God bless you on your continued path!!
I too am new to your website and writings. Thank you, thank you for all you’ve done and written. I am stronger for knowing you this way and I know esdeer even as it is will continue to help others along a healing path. Good luck on you future endeavours and thanks for taking us along for awhile
Maureen,
Although I don’t respond much on your website, I so appreciate your words and wisdom of comfort and hope during this first year of grieving from the death of my mother. You are an inspiration to many who are suffering.
Thank you so much for your kind heart and Good Luck to you on your next journey.
Dear Maureen,
I have commented further on Facebook, but I wanted to Thank You again for being a shining light in the darkness of having lost a child. My daughter, Paloma, died 15 months ago at the age of 21. Dealing with grief is, at the very least, bewildering. Your posts gave me hope that I could one day learn to incorporate the loss of my daughter into my life. Hope that I could go on. Hope that My entire spirit and self would not die with her. Hope that I could laugh again and remember the love, so much love, that is her legacy. Each day is a challenge but, thanks to you, I can now face that challenge and use the love and courage and hopefulness my daughter demonstrated so beautifully and gracefully to support me in this endeavor. I thank you for your kindness, honesty, support, and your guidance. I thank you for always being there. I wish you peace and love as you continue along in your journey.
Sincerely,
Lisa
Hi there, I totally understand what you are saying…my daughter is a brain cancer survivor and after her treatment I through myself into an online Angel Wings, we pray and offer encouragement to Caringbridge (website) patients of children who have cancer and also volenteered with Candleligters helping parents handle the shock of the new their child has cancer,..I got to a point, I had to step out of it and move on. But it is a journey I would travel again if I had to re-do it, if you know what I mean. My daughter is now being tested for thyroid cancer so again my focus has shifted, the treatment she recieved 5 years ago, was harsh…4 transplants, one year in hospital and radiation, and has caused many problems, very high price for survival..but we will get through each one…I understand totally what you are saying about moving on, and I wish you all the best, and you have helped many, many people…Carolyn
Thank you so much for your support. I am so grateful to have found you when I needed you most. I can’t imagine how many of us bereaved folk you have helped. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wish you happiness and peace. xxx Mary
I lost my only son January 16, 2008. That first year of grief I think I lost my santity. I have found great comfort in your sharing and will miss it. In my life I have lost 7 brothers, 2 sisters and both my parents and grandparents. The lost of my son was the worst. He would have been 45 October 7. I am greatful that he left me with 5 beautiful grandchildren. Thank you so much for the comfort you have given. It will be truely missed, but I wish you love and peace.
When I open up my computer every morning, the first thing I do is look to see if there is a new email message from you. The one this morning brought on a “near panic attack”. You have been my rock this last 7 months, because I feel that you “know what I am going through” as a mother losing an “adult” child in an auto accident. Every loss is different – everyone grieves in a different way – everyone grasps for strength, comfort and peace from different places – but your loss was similar to mine. We lost our 38 year old daughter on March 16 in the prime of her life.
I took some deep breaths, looked out the window to our beautiful blue sky with a gloriously bright sun and realized that life will go on without your daily encouragement. You have been just the type of “connection” that I have needed. Your way of approaching your own loss and grief has been just what I have needed. I have read many books, I have reached out to many internet sites, I have accepted the love of our friends, I have received strength and peace from our supreme being, and I have had Maureen Hunter.
Your 30 day email series kept me “alive” during the first 6 weeks after our daughters death. And your “quotes” on Facebook are quotes that I have shared many times during the last 7 months with friends of our daughter, who are grieving deeply, along with family members and on my Facebook status. So many times I felt like it was “just what was needed” today.
Now that you have reached this Y in the pathway of your life, I am wishing you strength and peace and total contentment as you see new and exciting things unfold before you.
May God bless you 1,000 fold for being there when you were needed the most in so many lives – including mine.
Hugs to you and yours today – give those grandchildren an extra hug – they are a blessing in our lives.
My sister killed herself almost 2 months ago and I found your website about a month ago. It has helped me immeasurably on this most terrible of journeys and helped me travel to a little stronger place. I’ve enjoyed your emails and having a safe place to post or vent where other people “get it”. It sounds like your journeys are taking you to to a better and possibly stronger place and I wish that for you! Thank you for this lovely, safe place and your sweet gentle spirit that helped so many of us through a season of terrible nights.
Thank You for all the advice and encouragement – I wish you luck in whatever you go forward and perceive – I hope I can be half as strong and move forward as you have. Thank You for the comfort and strength you have given. I will miss this immensely.
Thank You and God Bless….
Hi…I was widowed 15 months ago and through your email I have been recovering of my grief.It is very hard when you don’t have to much support of families,but I was thanking every time I opened my email and seen you were there.Very beatiful inspirations very coming from you..I am hoping maybe that a few times we might be able to get a newsletter from you telling us how you are also doing?Was very nice to meet you even on Internet…May God bless you in your other journey that you want to do..May God Bless YOU..Will always remember you….
I love your Stepping through Grief Facebook page! I am so honoured to have found it in my time of need. I understand what a comittment that would take on your part, and for that I am blessed.
Follow your heart, it always knows the way! I wish you nothing but happiness, contentment and peace!
Lots of Love
Julienne
I will miss your wonderfully warm insights. May God richly bless you in
your new endeavors.
Thank-you Maureen…for everything. Xoxoxoxo
Well for one full year I have looked forward to your writings and enjoyed everyone one of them.
How wonderful that you now are exploring other venues. It is your time Maureen, altho’ I will miss hearing from you, I too will be moving on. It is what our sons expect from us and I can see their joyous faces, knowing their moms are doing just fine. Much love and all the best, Dianne
I think this ending is another piece of hope you are providing. I frequently read the 6-7 year mark is a place where many parents start to see through the fog of grief. Your decision is like witnessing someone graduate. I am still in school but cheering you on and seeing hope that can be me one day. I think everything you have done on Esdeer can be a book. Not just the advice but all the resources you explored to find comfort. You offered something for everyone. I would call Esdeer a holistic approach to facing grief. I desperately hungered for you emails and words of comfort early in my grief. Now only a year and a half having lost my son, I do feel you have given me wonderful tools and I feel a little bit stronger today. If you do write a book, I will cherish it as a bible and a permanent resource I can always turn to at times of need. I think your advice is timeless because grief is a part of our world and the tools you offer will always be needed. Your gift is unique. Congratulations for graduating on to your next stage of your journey!
You have been so unselfish with your time and help. You have been a great help to me, as well. I will miss your words of comfort and wisdom.
Best of luck on your new endeavors.
Brenda
For awhile now I have sensed in you what I call a withdrawal. You seem to have done all that you possibly could to help us. Now it is your chance to honor yourself and your son in some other way. What ever you decide to do, I thank you for all your past help.
Thank you for all that you’ve done. You are a blessing to all of us. I wish you the best in whatever you choose to do. God bless you!
Good luck and many blessings.
Maureen… Your life and logic dealing with grief has been THE MOST INVALUABLE help in the loss of my brother, Kevin E Phelps, one year ago. You allowed me to come on your FB page and introduce him and his story to the world, something I know he cherishes as much as I do. I have saved all of your writings for further reflection and help cos I know this grief will never ‘pass’. That is probably the single biggest lesson you’ve taught me. We learn to live with it. With this ‘new normal’. And there comes a time, slowly, that we can also learn to thrive, with it. I lovingly and wholeheartedly support your efforts to do so now. You have given us ALL of yourself. I, for one, can never repay that blessing. The best thing I can do is tell you that you changed my grieving life for the better, an amazing gift to me. That you should be very proud of your efforts and work helping us all. And that if it is time for you to now move on yourself, PLEASE do so, for I know we all wish you nothing but the best in your life. I’m hoping peace, calm, & serenity will be your daily companions. And love. For you are so very deserving of them all, and so much more. From the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU, MAUREEN! I shall miss you tremendously, but I know, thanx to you, we have to go our ways, wherever they take us. You and the heart-lessons you shared, will never be forgotten!!! Much love!!! XOXOXOX
Dear Maureen,
In the thirteen monhs since the sudden death of my Sean and subsequently having to become responsible for his terminally ill wife and their two young sons I have been blessed with tremendous support not the least of which has been Stepping Through Grief. It afforded me a chance, day or night, to log on and read not only your gentle wise words of comfort but to see from the many anguished posts that I was not alone in my suffering. Lately it has helped confirm in me a desire to gradually move my focus from grief back into a life of creativity and gratitude.
So while I too will “miss” you, I send you many thanks and much love and understanding as you embark on the next leg of your life journey. Once again you are leading the way!
Much love ,
Christine Kealy NYC
Thank you so much Maureen for all you have done! It’s been a little over a year now since my husband of 32 yrs passed away. Your messages gave me the strength to carry on when all I wanted to do was lay in bed and make the world go away.
Much love,
Nina
Maureen, you have been a stepping stone for me during my grief from the loss of my beloved father 16 months ago. May God bless you in all your future endeavors. Linda
Aw Maureen!!! How considerate of you to send this communication out….I will have to say that yes, I will miss your emails and site terribly, however I believe that God has great plans for you and your ever compassionate heart. You have helped me so, through such a dark journey….one of unimaginable grief, rage, pain and sadness…..to something much better. A place where I can give thanks, recognize my many blessings and in turn, try to help others going through their own journey. May He bless you richly, whatever direction He is taking you and I wish you all the best! From across the pond in Texas-
Kathleen
Hello Maureen, I have so enjoyed this site but I do understand why you want to change direction. I will be forever thankful to you for being there for me during that awful time of trying to adjust to losing my beautiful son at the age of 39. I still miss him every single day and wish he was still here with us, healthy and happy but it’s not to be, so I will keep adjusting and getting on with my life. He would want that for me too. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wish you all the best. Love and hugs, being sent your way. Marilyn
I know that the time comes when one must make decisions and do what is best for them in their life, but I wanted to thank you so much for your Stepping through Grief series. It has helped me on many days when I didn’t feel there was anything good anymore. My grandaughter lost her life in a car crash 14 months ago. The healing has come slow and with many forward and backward days. Thank you, Maureen, for what you have accomplished in my recovery.
Thank you so much, Maureen, for helping me through this time. This month is a year since my husband died, the 17th. As the time draws closer I have very mixed emotions. It is still hard to believe he is gone….from my sight …but not from my heart. I will miss you, but I can understand you wanting to do other things. God be with you and bless you in all that you do.
thank you for all the FB messages – so many of which have touched my core and made me feel understood and ‘in company’ in my feelings. I wish you all the very best in everything you plan for the future – love and light xx
Maureen, although I am new to your website it has been so insightful and reassuring to read your email and listen to your video clips. Thank you for your heartfelt concern for others through your own grief as you have given much hope and inspiration and for the genuine person you are. All the best to you on your new path, with much Aloha.
Dearest Maureen…this decision comes as such a surprise, one mixed with sadness and once again a feeling of loss but, one I understand and support. All of our lives are constantly evolving and leading us in different directions. You’ve poured so much of your time, effort and soul into this project and have helped so many but, it seems our learning curve and need for growth never ceases. I’ve been enriched, comforted and given a new perspective by your work and also the chance to make new friends, who have come to mean so much to me. Without Esdeer and STG, I would not have had the opportunity to “write” this chapter in my life. I will miss your wisdom, insight and leadership and will never forget your contributions to the suffering. Best wishes for the future and someday, I hope to see your name appear on another creative endeavor. God bless you in your journey. Shelley Bosworth
THANK YOU for you support, we will miss you, your support an advise you gave my lovely sister Jude, has given her the strength to hold me together
we wish you well for your future endeavors
may the path be smooth and forefilling
best wishes and joy for the future.
sandra
Maureen,
I’ve only subscribed to Stepping Through Grief just a few months ago. I think it’s a wonderful healing service and I thank you for sharing your heart and your wisdom. Part of being wise is knowing when it’s time to make a transition such as you are making now. I have a passion for comforting and companioning grieving people. I’ve been leading a grief recovery group through my church for 3 yrs. now. My own experiences with grief have taught me so much. My husband of 35 yrs. died 12 yrs. ago, my mother lingers at the back end stage with Alzheimer’s (we’re in the 9th yr. of the Long Goodbye) and my brother, suffering from mental illness/alcoholism did a mall shooting 5 yrs. ago., essentially completing suicide by policeman’s bullet. Maureen, if it feels right to you, would you consider passing the baton to me? I’d like to pick up where you left off with Stepping Through Grief. Blessings either way dear Sister!
Maureen
I wish you love, success, and happiness – I can not begin to thank you for the wonderful Stepping through Grief site. I gathered much comfort reading your messages and those emotions of many others dealing with grief. I will miss the daily postings,and I thank you for the emotional help you have given me. Thank you for all the work, inspiration and comfort you gave to so many people, myself included. I will miss you !
I only discovered your website about a month ago, when I was at my most darkest moments dealing with the loss of my husband…..He passed away peacefully after a lengthy battle with cancer….his last months on earth, I was with him every step of the way, I was there for him in his last hours and I was there to see him take his last breath….I’m still not over those images, I doubt that I will be over them any time soon, but it has been a blessing to be able to share with you your experiences, take comfort in those quotes…I don’t feel so alone anymore….thank you so very much…god bless you
Dear Maureen, it is my son’s first anniversary on Saturday, and your messages were a lifeline for me – you are right, you have helped many people to see the reason to live after their child died. Your exciting plans for the future also fill me with hope – maybe, one day I could start feeling like you, ready for the new beginnings.
With much love,
Marina Jarvis
I am so sorry to hear this news. You have been a constant source of inspiration, support and comfort. I have collected those posts that were especially meaningful to me, and go to them whenever I need a lift. Thank you for your loving support of all of the bereaved out here. I’ll miss you! Wishing you happiness in everything you do.
Maureen, you have been a consistent and encouraging voice–understanding, hopeful, real–to any who are grieving. Your comments are always timely and valuable. Thank you for sharing yourself, your journey, and all that you’ve learned through the process! I’m sure you have made a tremendous difference to everyone who has read what you’ve written.
Wishing you success, happiness and fulfillment as you move in a different direction.
Warmly,
Judy
Dear dear Maureen, We understand your need to do this until now, had its purpose in your life and now it’s time to move on. It had been so comforting to hear from people who can relate directly to what we go through in grief. You have truky been a beacon of light in the darkness and I will feel a great loss not hearing and sharing with you and from you. I havelost my son in an car accident 18 moths ago and I am slowly finding the days a bit more bearable, so I have benefitted from this site so much. I wish you a life that can bring you some joy and thank you for your support from the bottom of my heart. May you have peace, love and joy . May your loved ones stay safe and thank you again for all you have given of yourself to all of us that shared in our grief and loss. God Bless. x
Maureen, Although I will be extremely sad to see you go, I understand and wish you all the luck in the world with your new endevers. You have helped me for 11 months now cope with the loss of my husband. I do not know what I would do without you. You definitely have saved my life. You kept me hanging on and I thank you for all your words of advice and your caring. You are truly an angel. I will miss you. Best wishes to you and your family.
I wish you all the best in what you do. I lost my 11 year old son many years ago, and my niece three weeks ago. She has left two sons without a mother and my sister is trying to cope with her daughter’s sudden death, and help look after the children. She’s not on internet so I’ve printed a couple of articles off this site which she says has helped her. Thank you for what you’ve done to help so many people. Joan Anne
Dear Maureen, You have been a God-sent, I thank you for all your wisdom and caring in these most difficult days and you have helped me carry myself along, to hold on to some thing and move past others, from my heart to yours, thank you.
Blessings, peace and happiness as you follow your new direction, be well!
You helped me so much when my Mom and Dad both died 6 weeks apart. They were the best parents in the world and my best friends I miss them so much!!! Thank you for all you help !
Best wishes to you Maureen. You have helped so many meet their grief. In your decision you have also modelled that life does go on after the event and while we are dealing with grief. I admire your honesty and strength as you shared openly with us. Thank you for being there.
Yvonne
Hi Maureen. although I have not corresponded with you very much I have read all your messages on fb etc. I have welcomed the support and love you for it. it is only 2 years since our beautiful son Sam was killed on his motor bike and we still grieve heavily. but with your help we have stepped through and made peaceful progress. From my experience and from the love and support that you and others have given me, I hope I too can be of support to others who unfortunately have to go through this. I totally understand your changes in direction and wish you all the best and also success. Go for it! love you Maureen, big Hugs. Jill
Thank you Maureen, for all your postings, your wisdom and your steadfastness. I have stayed with you through out the almost 3 years since I lost my beloved eldest daughter and best friend. I still find comfort and hope in your words. I will miss your pragmatic yet inspirational approach and wish you all that you hope for in your future. You deserve it for all you have given to others.
Chris
Dear Maureen–You have done so much for millions of people like myself. I just lost my youngest brother this year and I am caring for my 81 yr old Mom, whom has alzheimers. I didn’t connect with you until recently but you have helped me immensely. Everyday people the world over are losing loved ones and we all react in different ways. While you will be sorely missed, but you have to do what is best for you… with that I thank you and wish you good luck in all your life endeavors GOD BLESS YOU—Dale
Thank you for sharing your world and allowing us to benefit from your experience. Wishing you all the best in your future and what ever that may bring xx
i am sorry that u are not going to be with us you have helped me more than you will ever realize. I lost my husband of 53 year 17 months ago I was only 16 and he was 17 and i lost him at age 70. It is so hard facing each day alone. We did everything together so half of me is gone. I hear noises in the night and become frightened.I wasn’t prepared for all of this ans it a lot to handle> Thank you for all of your thoughts and encouragements in t he past and may god bless you > Yours in Christ , Mickey D. Jackson
Moving on is a wonderful place to be. Personally I am at my first brink in doing this and am so happy you are doing the same. You have provided a service out of the heart of a servant that can’t be duplicated. I ran onto your page by absolute accident and do not think it was an accident. Along with your page I have attended a Grief support group which came into my life at the perfect time. I believe that it is truly a God thing.
Have a wonderful future and blessing to you down under. Val Wilson, Puyallup, Washington USA
Sweet Maureen, I can’t thank you enough for all of your support, inspiration and love during the past several months of my ‘stepping thru grief’. To know that I’m not alone was one of the greatest things for me. ~ Best wishes in all of your upcoming endeavours and may God continue to bless you and your family with strength. <3 Johanna
Wow…I’m selfishly very disappointed as I have only recently come to rely on your messages and of course I’m no ready to be done. The world really doesn’t revolve around me and so I wish you all the best.
Maureen, I do wish you the very best in your upcoming ventures. You have meant so much to me in these six months since the loss of my dear husband, letting me know that what I am experiencing is the norm for so many who experience losses such as these. But what will I do without you and your kind words. I know it is selfish but losing you too is such a blow. I have looked forward each day to your messages. I will miss you mightily.
Sincerely, Diane
Thank you all so very much from the bottom of my heart for your most beautiful words and heartfelt comments. I appreciate all of them deeply. At this stage it is only Facebook and Twitter that I will be absent from. Whilst my direction is a work in progress, as you can all relate to I am sure, Esdeer is still here for you to access the many articles and resources.
Heart hugs to you all and once again thank you for your support and your love.
~ Maureen xox
Maureen,
I just found your sites and now you are leaving, I am sad to see you go but i am so happy for you!! I hope some day good things will happen for me too, i have to believe that! I lost my beloved husband Alan on 1/7/12 and my Daddy/Jack on 10/26/11 my heart is still so broken i wonder if i will ever heal people tell me i will never get over but i will get thru it and so far that is true,anyway i just wrote to say thank you so much for all of your support and kind words i needed a friend and you were there! God Bless You Maureen and all that you do from here on out!!
Love Cari
Maureen,
You have made me smile through my tears this last year and a half. I want to thank you for all of your kinds words. I would also like to wish you peace and happiness in whatever adventure you choose. God bless and take care of your self.
Maureen, thank you so much for helping me this far on my journey of grief. It has been 7 months since I lost my son, Jason, 29, to suicide. Your website and your comforting words have helped me through many sleepless nights and days filled with tears and sorrow. I wish you all the best. You are a wonderful, caring person and I am grateful for all you have done for so many. God Bless. With love, Randi
Thank you for all the years you dedicated in helping others in the loss of their loved ones, as time goes by we all have to let go of things that may take us in other directions, we are all so gateful for all the hard work and time consuming efforts to give encouragement to us all…and in saying may the angels wrap their wings around you and keep you safe from harm….I said ANGELS….all of our loved one that have passed, they were there with you and each of us as we made this journey together….God’s Blessings and Now its time for you to do what you have to do for yourself….Love and Hugs….Lora
Thank you for your thoughts and words, for the help you’ve given to so many. I lost my daughter, Chandra, and I am now 10 years in this grief journey. I can see how I have moved into different directions and paths of this journey. Into positive directions hopefully to be of help to others. Good luck to you and God Bless you as you start a new journey.
I will miss your daily post they have been one of the few things that have let me know that the grief I feel after losing my twin sister is normal and the feelings I have had and still have are a part of this process, I wish you will in your life and thank you for all the time you have put into this . I hope I can find peace sometime with my grief and once again will miss your posts .
May God always use you for His Honor and Glory wherever you go. God Bless!
A big thankyou Maureen – I know I could not have made it through these past 12 months without you – losing my Dad and then my Mum was just heartbreaking – the only person who seemed to understand and know the way I felt was you.
I read your writings all the time, over and over which really helped me – and although the pain is still sometimes very hard to bear, I no longer want to die to be with them, not just yet anyway.
I know I and many others will miss your support, felt sick when I read you
were leaving and just had to tell you thankyou for your love, understanding and help. God Bless. Lots of Love Pam xxx
Your f/b page has made me cry, given me hope and let me know all that what I am feeling is OK. Even though I did not respond to your post very often I was comforted knowing that other people were going through the same thing. Just like you are probably feeling now, I have come to the realization that life goes on, even though the ones you love have died, I made the choice to stop grieving and start living again, I enrolled in college to become a RN. I thank you from the bottom of my heart I lost my Mom shortly after you started Stepping through Grief, then my Dad, and a year ago my best friend and Sister Adrienne. I almost feel like you and me have traveled a heart wrenching journey together, we have both reached the other side. Bruised, battered but still standing. Good-Luck in all your endeavors. <3
Maureen-I wish you so much peace and happiness along with fufilled dreams in your continuing journey. I cannot tell you how much your words, kindness, love, and insight have meant to me. Take good care. Barb
I will miss you much as your site has been a huge boon to me during this time of loss but in the same I wish you the very best on your next steps in life ~hugs~
thank you , you have helped me in so many ways.
i lost a husband a year ago. I thought I should have died with him. at times i wanted to…..but your words have helped me more than you will ever know. I am now happily married to an amazing man. More amazing than I couldve ever hoped for.He is the love of my life. He loves my children as his own and is their “daddy” as they call him. Thank you for your bits of wisdom and positive light maureen. I hope life treats you well and that you enjoy every minute of it! God Bless you!
Hi Maureen, I read all your messages and my son will be dead for one year on the 27th of this month. I will have a mass for him and a picture in the Journal for his 1st anniversary of his death. Thank you for all your messages.
Love and God Bless,
Angie Agin
Maureen, what might my after life have been if I had not found you? I understand the progression of you leaving, but please promise that you will pop in now and again to tell us how your life is going. You were there for me, and us, in the most desperate times of life. I will be forever grateful. oxoxox Liz from Cali
Thank you, Maureen, for this site. Perhaps, you do know how much you have helped me, so I will be glad of it. I also know my beloved Walter will be thankful to you as well. He was always so protective of me and would be glad of this help you have given to me and others. All the best to you.
Bonnie
I’m sorry to see you go. I just found you and now you are going. I lost my son 1 year ago and still having trouble just talking about him and what happened. I’ve alway’s been a loner and tried to deal with my problem’s all by myself. I’m coming to the realazion that I may need some help to get through this but have a hard time trusting other’s. Anyway thank you for your support and helpful advice.
I will miss you so much but I am so happy you are moving on. I too look forward to the day when I will be able to move on too. You have helped me so much since my husband was killed last year. I am in a support group and I bring many of your writings to them so you have helped them too.Thank you for all you have done. You are a wonderful and caring lady. May God bless you always
Thank you for everything, you have helped me through a very difficult time losing my Dad, good luck in all you do. May God Bless you.
Maureen, you have my Rock. You will never know how i will miss you. This all I can say right now? Thank you.
Jearrie
Thank you all for the outpouring of support and your beautiful heartfelt messages. As you know I will no longer be posting on Facebook or Twitter but I will still be here at Esdeer and if you are subscribed to my newsletter you will continue to receive it regularly in your inbox. You won’t lose touch with me completely.
Sending you heart hugs ~ Maureen x
Today was the lowest I have been. I realized I not only lost my dear husband of 52 years, we went everywhere together, (I am 86 years old), and living a very lonely life, but I lost the precious gift of being able to pass on the wonderful memories of the old San Francisco, and the antiques of these relatives that lived then, I loved them so much, they took care of me when I was growing up.. None of my offspring care anything about any of their forebears, and my granddaughter who was living with me, for company, has gone to live with her boyfriend. I always had a great deal of physical ability and I have lost that also, my husband was always there to help me to walk.
I look at this death as a multiple loss, and am trying so hard to find a reason for the rest of my life.
epksmith@comcast.net
Feel so much for all that you are going through Elise. Even though you may not have family that care for your memories, you can journal all that within you to bring the gift of remembrance back into your heart and leave a legacy for others. I have always wanted to visit San Francisco, maybe it can be through the words of someone such as yourself. Blessings to you ~ Maureen
i hope there is some way that you can leave esdeer for people to access.
i have not written for a good while now. tuesday will be the one year mark of my mothers death. i am doing well – all because of you, your words and your experience – and also in your struggles with your own grief the wise words from others that you have shared with us all. i don’t know how you came to me – someone that knows me and knew i was in deep, deep trouble sent you to me and i have been a faithful follower since. i still read what you post and still go back and reread your wise words from time to time. if there is a way for esdeer to stay up then you can continue to help people thru their journey without having to write one more word. i was going to take my life. even though i had 3 grown children and 5 adorable grandchildren – i did not want to live without my mother, i felt so alone. all i wanted was to die rather than feel that longing for another minute. you saved my life and if i were a betting person i would bet that you saved countless others. i knew that a professional could not help me, a minister could not help me…………….i did not believe that anything or anyone could help me – till you came. i have sent many to you and i am sure that others have, too. and there is no reason in the worldthat we cannot continue to send the lost and the hurt to your words – even if you are not still posting. we were all blessed to have you while we did – and we can share you as long as we can get to your years of wisdom and learning and living with your own grief.
Linda, thank you so very much. Your words brought tears and touched me so. This website Esdeer will remain and I will continue to post articles from time to time and send out my newsletter. My facebook page will also remain though there will be no new posts only the old and treasured ones to scroll through. I am hoping to collate a lot of them into a book as I hadnt realised just how much people came to them again and again for comfort, for hope and for understanding. I will still be here ~ Maureen
What can I say – your inspiring words through your writings have help to move forward in my own grief journey. Good to know that you will not be going away completely. Blessings on all your new beginnings. Perhaps I’ll see you on Pinterest. Anne