I’ve been dipping in and out through this book now for a few months and really liking what I’m reading. Much of what Dr Louis LaGrand writes reflects very much what I believe about grief and our ability to heal.
I believe that healing can enter the broken places of our life in three ways:
1. By feeling all the pain and anguish of our loss and expressing the gamut of emotions that comes up for us.
2. By finding ways to connect and bring the love and memories of our loved one into our day to day.
3. By filling part of our day, most days, with re-investing in life, living our life now and facing towards our future.
He covers each of these in his book Healing Grief, Finding Peace. 101 Ways to Cope with the Death of Your Loved One.
The first part of the book is an overview of grief and healing and includes the five gifts for getting through our loss. He states that a gift is not a reward but a sign of love which we can give to ourselves.
Gift 1: Knowledge about grief and grief work
Gift 2: The desire to make wise choices
Gift 3: Learning the truth about the death and that life must change
Gift 4: Myth breaking
Gift 5: Persistence
The second part of the book is all about grief healing – 101 ways. These are short and easy to read. You can read one after the other or dip into when you feel like it. Each has a positive message helping to support us as well as giving us practical suggestions for moving through our grief towards healing. His messages honour the impact that grief has in our lives as well as recognise the continuation of our love for our loved ones. “We are eternally connected through love.”
Dr Louis LaGrand has been working in the field of bereavement for over thirty years, writing, conducting research and supporting those who grieve to find their way again. Peppered throughout the book you will find some of his less personal and more academic words coming through – “secondary losses”, “place of disposal”, “transitional object” and “disenfranchised grief”. Don’t let that put you off. This is a great book for anyone who is grieving and who is ready to begin healing their brokenness and find hope in a new tomorrow.
I’ll leave you with a quote from the beginning of the book:
“Time heals all wounds is an often quoted message of hope given to those mourning the death of a loved one. Regrettably, it is a half-truth at best. As a wise mother whose seventeen year old son was killed in an automobile accident said to me: Time only heals if you work between the minutes……….This book is all about working between the minutes…..” Louis LaGrand
Maureen Hunter is an inspirational writer and grief steps mentor giving comfort and hope to many. She is passionate about helping people to step through grief and build a new and different life after loss, one in which their loved one is always a part of. Sharing how to keep hearts connected forever.